This article offers a simple to use modification of the popular life coaching tool called the ‘Tombstone Test’.  Its purpose is to determine your values as a person and the exercise simply has you write out the text which will appear on their tombstone.  Straightforward and profound.  For example, mine might say:

The Tombstone Test

“Here Lies Doug, he was a committed father and husband, an avid personal growth advocate, and a leader in a movement which brought wellness into the forefront of our society.”

While I like this coaching tool and have done it myself, I’ve had trouble overcoming the morbidity of its application.  If you think of the Law of Attraction (and I happen to be one that fundamentally believes its principles yet feel many use it inappropriately without understanding the core component of action), it would seem that writing out the context of your tombstone is unlikely to prolong your life.  I suspect there is little harm to be done by thinking through this, but why not create the same results by writing in terms of the celebration of your life, rather than the memory of your death?

Here’s a different tool I’d encourage you to try.

Your 100th Birthday Speech

Imagine that you are turning 100 years old in a week and you’ve got the time to write out a fantastic speech at the most festive party in celebration of your life.  The party is where you’d like it to be, the guests are as numerous or as few as you’d like to invite.  Your one job is to write out a 5 minute speech (that’s about 1-2 pages long typed), highlighting the most amazing parts of your long and successful life and to share gratitude for this. 

Differences between the two

The Tombstone test clearly provides little room for detail.  That’s good and bad – it forces you to get to the point, focus on your values, and its easy to reference.  The birthday speech lets you elaborate, to create a vision and to really share gratitude (a powerful positive emotion).  You may write less about specific values and more about life events in our birthday speech – but it would be easy to draw your values out from what you wrote – just look at the themes that surface. 

When I think about the 100th birthday speech, my thoughts immediately wander to my father.  He turns 94 this November, and at his age he’s had countless near death experiences (literally).  With the health issues he’s faced, I often ponder what keeps him going?  I am not 100% sure but I have a strong suspicion its his love for life.  I’ve never met a man that wants to reach 100 years old more than my father and he’ll do anything to reach it.  I am passionate about wellness and love life as much as he.  If a tool such as this even begins to set my mind to the same mentality that he’s got, I’ll easily focus my attention on doing everything I can to create that reality. 

Write your 100th birthday speech and let me know what you find.  If you’ve lacked direction in life, a longer perspective may be the shift you need to create it.

Be Well

Related Articles:

• Writing your Personal Mission Statement
• Developing the Vision
• 10 Steps to Success - Step 3 Develop a Vision
• The Six Components of Whole Person Wellness